Everly Marie Dottei, My Daughter and Proud ECMO Survivor!
When Dalton and I found out we were pregnant with our first child in July-August of 2018, we were SHOCKED!
I was paranoid, scared, happy & IN LOVE. We would soon have the next 2-1/2 years of our lives the most challenging time.
I was working full time as a Manager & Bartender when i was pregnant with Everly. I remember my last day i was pouring a regular, John, His beer and went to go step off of the stool and twisted my ankle. I was 36 weeks pregnant and couldn't walk due to the injury and got taken to the hospital to check on the baby. To my surprise i wouldn't be going home that day let alone, weeks....
While in the hospital, My doctor came in and we ran another ultrasound just to check on the baby, and to my surprise my fluid was LOWER.
Facts about Amniotic Fluid....
Low amniotic fluid levels, known as oligohydramnios, can occur in around 4% of pregnancies and may indicate problems such as fetal growth restriction, birth defects, preterm birth, or complications with the placenta or umbilical cord.
Normal AFI values are between 5cm and 25cm. An AFI below 5cm is considered oligohydramnios, while an AFI above 25cm is considered polyhydramnios.
To our surprise our Dr. informed us she would like to do a c-section because my fluid was measuring at 4-5 which is too low. I Wish i would've asked to stay in the hospital for the weekend, monitored, so I could have the steroid shot for my babies lungs longer. The next day, February 22nd 2019 is when we were scheduled for the c-section.
At 12:56pm she came out limp and blue, as she was struggling to take breaths in between faint cries. I remember hearing her weak cry as her dad, Dalton swiftly carried her to the NICU. The hours turned into days, and all I could do was wait, unable to hold my daughter, my heart sinking every time a monitor beeped.
All the dreams of what this first moment of motherhood would look like shattered as I stood, helpless and anxious, praying for my daughter's strength and life. Each day brought new tests and complications. The staff assured me they were doing everything they could, but in that hospital room, time stood still.
We learned our precious baby, Everly, her lungs both collapsed and she was on the verge of dying. I was in shock! as i was wheelchaired back to the NICU i was awaited by multiple life-flight EMS and NICU nurses and staff trying to get her stable to fly.
Everly & her flight squad and NICU nurses stabilizing her
Those weeks in the NICU were some of the most agonizing of my life. We stayed in the downtown hospital for 2 weeks! Every day checking out at 11am and checking back in at 7pm. They only had 7 rooms. Those 7 rooms usually went to the families with the most critical babies. Everly was considered the #1 Most Criticial baby in the NICU. She was Placed on ECMO at only 2 Days old. Yet, amidst all of the pain, worry, and exhaustion, I found an indomitable strength and determination within myself. The fight my daughter displayed taught me more about resilience than any other life experience could have.
Trigger Warning: This is an actual picture of our daughter, Everly
after being placed on ECMO at 2 days old.
ECMO stands for Extracorporeal Membrane Oxygenation. It's a treatment that uses a pump to circulate blood through an artificial lung back into the bloodstream of a very ill baby. This system provides heart-lung bypass support outside of the baby's body. It may be used during the recovery from heart failure or lung failure, or after heart surgery when a baby's condition is unstable. ECMO does the work of the heart and lungs, which allows these organs to rest and heal during this critical period. It can support a baby for days to weeks while doctors treat the underlying illness. It's generally used for infants with severe but potentially reversible conditions.
Everly was on ECMO for 14 days. 14 days we sat, slept and waited. Used hand sanitizer after sanitizer til our hands were dry. I cried, laughed, enjoyed everyones company that came by and prayed with us. All while i was in so much pain from my C-section. Seeing my daughter in pain eliminated my pain. I never fully healed properly. As a mother, we tend to put aside our pain and take on our children's pain.
When I held my little warrior for the first time, tears rolled down my face, but they were tears of joy and relief. I finally felt that initial overwhelming love of being a mother, coupled with gratitude towards the medical staff that helped my little one through her ECMO journey.
Looking back now, even though things did not turn out as planned, I wouldn't trade our journey for the world. Through all the tears and pain, our love only grew stronger. Life often throws us curveballs we don't expect. But in those trying times, we realize our true strength, both individually and as parents.
My journey through PCOS and a complicated pregnancy was not what I'd hoped for, but I wouldn't trade the life of my miracle child for anything. The experience made me realize that although the journey to parenthood was harder than most, I had emerged as a stronger person ready to face any challenges that come my way.
Everly Today 2023
Now, my daughter is my little warrior, a symbol of courage, and a beacon of hope. We are here today, standing tall against all odds, proving that miracles do happen. She's the very reason I cherish every moment, hold hope for a brighter tomorrow, and find joy in every little triumph. And, we hope our story inspires others going through similar trials and shows them that it's always darkest before the dawn.
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